Daily Encouragement Net Header
The on line Bible teaching ministry of Stephen & Brooksyne Weber
A daily, Bible-based perspective of hope, encouragement and exhortation.
Home   About Us  Archives   Free email subscription   ListenListen to these messages
  Print Text only for printing

  Bookmark and Share  

Make A Donation
 See here for more info.

<Previous Message                           Next Message>

Monday, February 11, 2013

Conodoguinet Creek, Franklin County PA
Conodoguinet Creek in Franklin County PA runs right through the Roxbury Camp where we held our Winter retreat

ListenListen to this message on your audio player.

Marriage series: We celebrate Valentine's Day on Thursday and this week we will share a series of messages with the main points based on Gary Chapman's book, "The Five Love Languages". In doing so we will use the outline of the five languages, featuring a different one each day. This week we want to provide messages that will strengthen marriages. However most of these points will apply to all relationships.

"The Blessing Of Affirming Words"

"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen" (Ephesians 4:29).

Yesterday we participated in our Sunday School winter class retreat at Roxbury Camp and shared a message with the couples. We illustrated the blessing of affirming words by using "Mr. Wonderful", a talking male figure with a broad smile and huge feet. Brooksyne presented Mr. Wonderful to me in 2004 during the Valentine season. We've had a lot of fun and found illustrative value now for almost 9 years and he still works!

Yesterday I shared how Mr. Wonderful gave me some ideas on words and phrases that are a blessing to Brooksyne. When pressing his hand
in his charming, masculine voice he utters phrases such as, "No, honey, you don't look fat in that dress. You don't look fat in anything you wear." Or "Darling, take all the time you need. I don't mind waiting one bit."

Mr. Wonderful presentation at winter retreat 2/10/13

It appears in the photo above that Mr. Wonderful is uttering one of those female pleasing phrases (notice my "ouch" grimace and her adoring smile). Brooksyne was so taken with Mr. Wonderful that she bought Mr. Wonderful II the following year. He gets me into even more trouble when he says things like, "Did you have a hard day, Honey. Why don't you sit down and let me massage your feet?" Or "Actually, I don't know which way to go. I'll just turn in here and ask directions" (so, not me - I don't even like the GPS telling me where to go)! How many of you men would say, "Here, you take the remote. As long as I'm with you I don't care what we watch." Or the most incriminating, "You're going shopping by yourself, Honey? How about if I tag along just to carry your bags?"

We visited the Shady Maple Gift Shop a couple years ago and I saw a sign advertising Mrs. Wonderful. I got all excited about blessing Brooksyne with Mrs. Wonderful (thinking it was my turn to get blessed). But unfortunately once I reached the display I found they were out of them. But there were only more Mr. Wonderfuls staring me in the face. I'd had enough of that guy already! (Brooksyne's edit: I was secretly relieved when I saw Mrs. Wonderful was not available.)

Now, what spiritual truth am I going to get out of this story, you may wonder. Mr. Wonderful is an animated figure designed to build up the wife according to her needs (although he might be a bit insincere as to what a man is really like).

Paul exhorts the believer in Ephesians 4:29 to do three things:
  • Get rid of unwholesome talk
  • Speak that which builds others up
  • Benefit all who listen
Can you think of someone who is the epitome of this verse? If you answer, "That's my spouse", you are greatly blessed. Certainly Paul intended this passage for the entire church body, but what's good for the church is good for the family, isn't it!

Unwholesome talk - Paul is writing about one very small but powerful part of our body. The tongue! So much is accomplished with our tongue, for good or evil. Unwholesome talk includes that of malicious gossip, cruel teasing, profanity, obscenities, and other unwholesome communication in addition to the tone we engender as we speak. 

Build Others Up - When conversation flows from a gracious, principled heart it will build others up, including our spouse. When we consider other's interests more important than our own we will look out for them, listen to them, and serve them in a way that encourages and lifts them from their heaviness of heart (Philippians 2:4). 

Benefit those who listen - Our conversation with our spouse or a fellow believer goes far beyond the few moments we spend speaking with one another. What we say to one another can have a lasting impact that either builds up (edifies) or tears them down.

In our marriage and in all relationships may we be characterized by affirming words!

Be encouraged today,

Stephen & Brooksyne Weber

Praying manDaily prayer: Father, we desire to communicate with our spouses, family members and other people in a way that builds up and benefits those who listen. As we establish Biblical principles in our heart, they will act as filters for that which flows from our tongue. We can do all things through Christ who strengthens us. Amen.

Here are the five "Love Languages" we will deal with this week:

1) Affirming Words             
2) Quality Time                  
3) Thoughtful Gifts
4) Cooperative Service
5) Physical Intimacy

Now with nearly thirty-seven years of marital experience Brooksyne and I will add one. Tease each other and have fun!

Mike, a friend of ours with a sense of humor shared these potential statements a "Mrs. Wonderful" doll might say. I might add he's happily married!
  • Oh, Dear, you go ahead and watch the game while I clean up.
  • Darling could I rub your feet?
  • Don't hurry back from the mountains—I know how much you enjoy being out in nature with the other guys.
  • Just leave the seat up in the bathroom so it will be more convenient for you.
  • I made your favorite dessert—have an extra piece.
  • The aroma of your socks blends well with the scent of my candles.
  • I subscribed to Field and Stream to stock your bathroom with high quality reading material.
  • You don't have to say a thing—I know what you mean.
  • You just nap for a few minutes until dinner is ready.
  • You must have had a hard day—let me get you the paper and your slippers.
  • It is such a privilege to submit to you my darling husband.
  • I got up an hour early so that you would have plenty of time in the bathroom.

Mount Pleasant winter retreat 2/10/13
Nelson was up early in the morning grilling potatoes, veggies, and shrimp over a hot ring of fire just like we have on our annual men and boys campout. How I wish we could post the appetizing smells!

Mount Pleasant winter retreat 2/10/13
Larry, carefully inspecting his dishwashing skills, with his LED headlights. (Ruby, another class member, in background.) One of the things that has impressed Brooksyne over the years is how the men are often the first ones to line up for dishwashing duty following a meal at the church. But "Mrs. Wonderful" (had I found her that day) would never compare her husband's lack in this area to men who might be more willing to clean up in the kitchen.

Mount Pleasant winter retreat 2/10/13
Our Sunday School class enjoying breakfast together in the cabin.

Today's Suggested Music and Supplemental Resources

"Glorious Freedom"  Video  Gaither Vocal Band

"The Five Love Languages" can be ordered at Amazon or many other sources.

For the geographically curious, our weekend retreat was held at Roxbury Camp at the base of Blue mountain where the first tunnel is located as you are going west on the PA Turnpike.  (See here for location on Google map)

Browser logosThese are articles we come across in the course of studying for these messages or just poking around the vast Internet. In most cases they are not necessarily related to the daily message but may be of interest to our readers. These articles will only be posted once and there will be new ones each post, assuming we come across material that we feel may be of interest. (To see previous links use the archive version.)

My Train Wreck Conversion  "As a leftist lesbian professor, I despised Christians. Then I somehow became one." by Rosaria Champagne Butterfield  An amazing story and a testimony to the power of God’s word. It is a great example of what we should and shouldn’t do to reach the lost. "I have not forgotten the blood Jesus surrendered for this life.  And my former life lurks in the edges of my heart, shiny and still like a knife. h/t Eternity Matters

"But I cannot understand why something which is unpopular because of what it means should become frightfully popular because it no longer means anything."

a message to Stephen & Brooksyne

Free email subscription To receive the "Daily Encouragement" each Monday-Friday through email see this page to subscribe to our email list. You can also subscribe to the Wordpress rss feed or through a Wordpress email subscription. (See the email subscription on the right side after opening this page.)

Make A DonationAre our daily encouragement messages a blessing to you? We ask you to consider making a donation to Daily Encouragement Net so that we can continue to prepare and provide this daily resource which is accessed by believers and seekers all over the world. Daily Encouragement Net relies solely on the generosity and financial support of its readers and podcast listeners. See here for more information on supporting this ministry. Gifts are tax deductible.

Permissions: Please feel free to pass on, reproduce and distribute any material on Daily Encouragement Net, in part or in whole, in any format, provided that you do not alter the wording in any way or charge a fee beyond the cost of reproduction. It is our desire to spread this material, not protect or restrict it. I do request that you keep the contact, copyright and subscription information intact.

Text only version for printing: To make a text only version for printing (without photos or any of the supplemental materials)
1) Open the basic text editor that comes with all computers (known as wordpad, textpad, etc.) You can also use a program like Word and select paste text only.
2) Select and copy the text from the portion of the message you want to print.
3) Paste into the text pad. (The photos won't show up but you will have a brief text description of the photo which you can delete or just ignore.)
4) Format if you desire (change font, increase or decrease size, etc.)
5) Print!

Scripture references are from The Holy Bible: New International Version. © 1984 by International Bible Society; NEW AMERICAN STANDARD BIBLE®, Copyright © 1995 by The Lockman Foundation, New King James Version (NKJV) Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. and the King James Version.

Personal Mission Statement: "I am created by God to bring Him glory. Through God's Son Jesus Christ I have been redeemed and I make it my life's goal to please the Lord. My mission in life is to honor God through my faith and obedience and to prepare myself and all whom I may influence for eternity."

© Copyright 2013 Stephen C. Weber - All Rights Reserved

Daily Encouragement Net - 495 Kraybill Church Road - Mount Joy, PA 17552  USA

This device counts unique visitors by nation and state. I installed the international version in mid April 2010 and the state version later. They thus register unique visitors to since then.
free counters

Free counters!

"Living securely today anchored in God's solid foundation"